Let's Express

BOATEL – THE SEQUEL

Last August 13th, 2017, I penned a piece I called “MY STORY – BOATEL OBJECTION.” It concerned a proposed floating hotel for Cork called “My Story.” Two likely Irish lads proposed buying this boatel and sitting on the River Lee near the city. As things stand, you couldn’t swing a cat in the city and hotel beds are in short supply. So the idea is a good one

MY STORY – BOATEL OBJECTION

In my earlier article I pointed out that, “It wouldn’t be Ireland without some self-serving prick lobbing in an objection, (to planning). Brian O’Mahony, a resident from the Wellington Rd area, has lodged an appeal against the boatel. Now, Wellington Road is a goodly distance away from the proposed Penrose Quay berth and the little boat will not be visible from anywhere on his street, so I wondered what was bothering the lad.”

Well the good news is that An Bord Pleánala has upheld the decision by Cork City Council to approve the novel accommodation facility on the northern bank of the River Lee next to the Michael Collins bridge. The Examiner tells us that,  “The ruling clears the way for the developer, Sick and Sore, to open the hotel and restaurant on the 105m vessel which previously operated as a luxury cruise ship on the River Rhine. It has three decks containing 87 cabins, lounge areas, a sun deck and restaurant.

Sam Corbett, the businessman behind plans for the so-called boatel said, “I expect that some of the hotel’s biggest customers would be backpackers after I signed a deal with Paddywagon Tours for the vessel to be used as a stopping point on their round-Ireland tours.” Good idea Sammy boy! What caught my eye though was the objector stating that, among other problems, “The amenity of the ship’s bedrooms would be compromised as the vessel would be moored directly against the quay wall.”

I wonder what lad O’Mahony is worried about here? So cabin windows flush with the key wall at low tide, so what’s to be afraid of? Does the naughty-minded Brian fear that God-fearing Irishmen could be unexpectedly confronted by naked German Frauleins frolicking with each other in their cabins? Maybe it’s the possibility of young hussies from London over on a dirty weekend in our pure and sin-free Cork City? Could he be worried about an influx of nubile nymphets from Dublin, down on the train to corrupt our fine young fellas with their peace and free love ideas? Whatever is itching his ire, I suggest that Sam Corbett of ‘Sick & Sore,” makes sure there are heavy curtains installed in all of the cabins lest the vigilant patrolling Brian should catch a sight that scandalizes him into fainting.

Ah fuck it, that’s enough of that nonsense!
Well done An Bord Pleánala and our Cork City Council and well done Sam Corbett, so roll on the boatel. I might even stay myself one night for the hell of it and if I don’t, I will at least have a pint on board. Free enterprise and risk has won over the grasping tiny minds of the curtain sniffers!

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