Let's Express

Inflight Entertainment

At the end of April I wrote about a trans-atlantic flight that felt the need to jettison nearly all of their fuel off Ireland and make a bolt for Shannon. Apparently a plastic pencil-shaped device that emits steam was at the centre of the panic on that occasion. The rash maneuver cost the airline €100,000 in dumped fuel and landing costs.   

I was again amazed when, not one but two other such flights rushed off course to land once again in Ireland. Could it be our famous hundred thousand welcomes I wondered? Possibly but initial  reports suggest emergencies on board both flights instead.  

You can check out the link to discover that nobody tried to hi-jack either plane armed with an e-cig. The Delta flight that landed in Dublin had a problem with the loo. I've checked and there appears to be nine separate toilets on this aircraft and it was not too far from its destination in Amsterdam. So what could possibly go wrong with one of the nine toilets that forces the plane to land prematurely and in the wrong airport?

Turkish Airlines flight TK-3 was even more hilarious. A passenger took ill and yet they landed in the one place where A&E emergency services are threatening their very own entry in the Guinness Book of Records for failure. The queues at A&E's are legendary now in Ireland and that includs at the University Hospital Limerick where the offending passenger was taken. Locals could not get a word with a HSE doctor for love nor money as many of them are out scouting the grounds around the hospital in search of smokers and vapers.


Yet some of those HSE white coats were diverted to travel the twenty miles out to Shannon to accompany the solitary passenger on the long drive back to the hospital. I swear to God, we are all losing the run of ourselves!  And last Tuesday no less, we had had another air incident this time diverting into Belfast. This likely lad was charged with endangering the safety of the aircraft, disruptive behavior on board and common assault. Is it possibly the rarified air up there or does flying that close to the sun do something to the brain? 


Or have we succumbed to outbreaks mellow-drama over every little thing. Why didn't one of the cabin crew just go back to the guy and say, "Will you sit to fuck down you noisy Yank and shut up 'cause you're pissing everyone off. Why don't you just relax,  have a few pints and watch the movie?"


Or is a little bit of drama on board worth all the wasted fuel?

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